Letters from Nana Petra
Re: waiting for e mail.

H I Milo 

I don’t have much news this week what I had is over shadowed By all the excitement of the Baftas that you attended, it was lovely of you and Jamie  to telephone on your way.i sat glued to the tele to see if you were within range of the cameras ,and even went over to Sky news and BBc news not a single glance, I did see George Clooney, he certainly has sex appeal as well as being very attractive,you never see him grumpy! I thought Jamie’s dress was very pretty and the red was a nice choice,it’s a pity the weather was so inclement must have been cold standing around. 

if y ou remember last Sunday it snowed here quite hard and Stephanie and Kieth cleared the snow away for me, it’s been very cold this week to top the lot my heating bill arrived and although it didnt include the last ad coldest week I think I will have to take out a mortgage to pay it,I have had to have the heat on at night so that didnt help.Its amazing how times have changed, most houses before central heating only had one fire for the whole of the house and beds were piled high with blankets, I think people also dressed more sensible too or maybe could stand the cold better,it may have been all those stews ,puddings ,and porridge that helped.

Roger returned to. America on Monday,I still don’t know how he fared with the trains and the plane,Aunty Kit is in the nurseing home and has settled down ,the staff seem very nice, I haven’t been able to visit as im still in quarantine with the the dreaded bug I have just finished the anti biotics and have to have a culture done this week,.

I. Had a sort out this week of old photographs and found some memerabiliar of our trip on the Orient Express that was a great treat,we arrived in Paris in the afternoon and went for tea in a very smart cafe, and who should be sitting at one of the tables by Christene Onassis ,she had an enormous stand of patisseries bought to the table and within a short time ,half of them were gone,I noticed,no wonder ,at that time she was a pretty large girl,and it did surprise me that she was alone,all the fuss that some stars have these days with their retinue of bodyguards and then wonder why they are photographed so much The evening was the highlight though at Maxims,

I sent for a dress this week, it’s ages since I bought a dress, if you remember I always made my own clothes, however this was pure silk and fully lined very nicely made just needs a small lace panel made to fit the front , as I don’t have any boobees the front is a bit lower than is attractive, the colour in the wrap magazine said the colour was pink oyster but it’s more of a coffee colour or maybe it’s only my old fashioned colour pallet that make it look coffee.i would have said oysters were lighter! Anyway. I am very pleased with it and look forward to be well enough to wear it .thats the question my outings for the entire 2011 was two visits to the hospital one to the doctors for My flue jab , three visits to Ashley the dentist,and one trip to Lily’s birthday party when I was taken on to dads before coming home,a real gad about!Of course a hell a lot of the year was trying to get rid of something devastating ,like this bloody bug !!!!!!!!!

I’m having lamb chops this evening with mint my. Mouth is watering already, I can now have dairy product so there’s lots of swigging of milk going on, it’s amazing that when you are told you mustn’t eat or drink something how you crave for it, I slipped up a couple of times I had ordered pot of very thick double cream before the kick off and it winked at me from the fridge every time I opened the door, how my. Mouth watered at the sight and thought of it especially as Aunty Joan had made me some mince pies, as she couldn’t get them to me at Xmas, eventually I gave in of course and thought in for a penny in for a pound and put a big splash on a couple of the pies thinking it won’t hurt,that assumption was totally wrong as within half an hour it decided it wasn’t staying down,that will teach me to obey all medical instructions !

It’s started to rain, they did warn that the weather was going to be milder and wet, well for once they were right weren’t they,no news as you have seen, don’t forget it’s dad and my birthday on the seventeenth that’s Friday we would both apreciate a little of your attention for it,it would mean a lot to Dad to get a card from you ,I’m not asking for a hand made one or anything.

Take care look aft er yourself, when is the Kernel’ s launch ? When do we get the first of the press edition ?

Lots of love nana.   Xxxxx I hope you are saving these e mails ! Still waiting for first reply!

a day late !

The snow is slowly thawing for a while even the ugliest place looked pretty,things have changed though, in the old days the first signs bought people out of doors kids liked to snowball and sledge ,and the oldies cleard the snow from their pavements and path ways,most of it done in good humour ,not done so much on these housing estates,but in the distance, up on the lines and that hill behind the house that your mum and dad lived in, there were lots of people enjoying the weather, I didn’t get an answer when I telephoned dad but later he said they had taken the girls and the dog, bought a couple of sledges and gone up to the banks, they all had a fun time, in fact the girls didnt want to come home , after lunch they returned to the slopes again!i was lucky in that Stef next door, and Kieth clearedmy snow away for me.my goodness how things have changed in the past you would have found me wrapped up warm and out in the garden enjoying the air,

Auntie Joan came to see Aunty Kit at the nursing home they had lunch here  before going, my goodness how she looks like Margaret at that age, I didn’t say it as most people look horrified if you do, perhaps they liken the appearance With the actual age they are at that time,Patrick drove her down, my goodness how many more ecsentricks do we have in the family we all went to Italy one year driving down from Germany , that was a really good time.Uncle ken had it all mapped out and we didn’t miss a single sight, that was when we went to Berchasgarden,I remember the bronze lift going up to the restaurant,perhaps that was because the lift was tightly packed and facing me was a huge fat German, and his belly was pushing in to me, on the arrival  out at the top Aunty Joan remarked about all the dust on top of the slope,it was June and that was snow,we all laughed when we got the coach back down to the car park and joan called Ken to tell him which coach to get on, and the Austrian driver imitated her and every one laughed,as did we when Patrick bought that up.he and Andrew were studying for their exams at that time,Patrick had to work hard but Andrew had a retentative memory and finished very fast.

Nothing much on television this week I watched Birdsong , all takes place in the first world war.i think I would have enjoyed the book,which was very popular but I think the ‘hero’ put me off , he was suppose tobe twenty to start off with,he looked too old for that to be true, and there again he hade a strange stare all the time,just one expression not very handsome unlike the Booth boy in the Charlie Dickens  thing a couple of weeks ago.I forgot to watch the super bowl thing last night had I known Madonna was going to do her thing I would have watched it,not that I like her you understand, just to know what she is up to.she was on the Grahame Norton show and it sure was heavy going, he had difficulty getting her to say anything at all and half the time was lost for words and looked it ,she looked as if it was the last place she wanted to be but she had a film to promote,GN must have been over the moon to know he had her as a guest but it all fell apart.these you understand are critisum from someone who thinks she a marvellous reinvention and money maker but not a very nice person.

dad came over on Wednesday and started rummaging around for old photographs as he had decided to copy them , the amount he took I thought he will never do all those, and I was right the next day he returned them but took some more stressing that he was being selective about the copying it will be another fad next week.

.congratulations on being made features editor at the catholic herald I see from the frog on twitter that you are often visiting the catholic church, is this something I should know about ? I thought at first it was something to do with the wedding, are you having a church wedding , I don’t hear anything from you with regards toSabina,you don’t mention any social engagements  with her in fact there seems a lot of women in your life that you twitter but not her I see she is very pretty .

You notice I’m doing lots of paragraphs today I do try hard with this gadget ,I fail dismally sometimes for instance a few days ago I lost all the e mail information and however many things I tapped nothing worked, I carried on trying then it all apeared just like that and I couldn’t for the life of me work out which movement had cured it ,as you say trial and error.

I read your articles in the Kernel today very good they were too, I can’t say I understand every thing that’s written but I do try, it’s the abbreviations that get me every time.i don’t understand any of them ,even google refuses to help sometimes.i have only just worked out what an app is I still too nervous to get one downloaded  even the free ones as they might not understand which one I want,the BBC I player is marvellous,I’ve been trying to help make my back stronger,and sit in the kitchen at the table useing them and catching up with the late night stuff.i still haven’t managed to get the ITV programes, it tells me a need something and when I follow the arrow it tells me it’s not on this I pad,so I ask ,why did they send the arrows and promise me I could have it free !!!!

I’ve had to get the milkman to bring me some spring water and to cancell the milk due to the anti biotics I’m on.i have four more days to go on them,please keep your fingers crossed that the dreaded bug has gone this time,it didn’t work last time so I’m not holding my breath,I see that you have DHS staying with you this week,does he come from new castle he sends some of his tweets from there I don’t always understand them, there’s something I miss from them,can you put me wize he does travel a lot I see,so he is his own boss I presume.by the way what happened to photogirluk at the week end,I know I wasn’t ment to follow it but I tried to, it must be all this resting I have to do !

well it’s getting on and I have to choose what to have to eat now , so busy you see,such hard tasks , do not throw this e mail in the dustbin,incidentally I’ve had some odd twitter people that I’ve bined for no other reason than their  interests didn’t interest me and they didn’t have your little picture on,so they weren’t your friend.having  said that what do I know about all these start ups that are friends of your who I do keep on my twitter.

I am off to the fridge now  kids are now having a snowball fight on their way home from school just when everything is thawing,!   Lost of love I will twit you to tell you this is on its way.take care and keep warm the freezing weather is here for a further week apparently  love u.    Nana xxxxxy

Having a bit of a drama

I was going to wait until six o clock to see if I had a phone call from you but I don’t feel very well and think I would be better off going to bed early so there for I am e mailing you early,I still have hopes of you sticking with the phone call,if you recall I have a telephone in the bedroom !its been one hell of a week this week for me .

The weather has been all over the place and it seems to have been cold most days ,the time has flown,that’s a damn silly saying isn’t it ,as if clocks have wings,I lost last year and this one feels as if it’s going down the pan with it,my mental plans don’t seem to arrive in operation,oh I have every intention of doing something but trying to cope with breathing is a problem I could do without.not meaning altogether not breathe ing 

On Monday I had an e mail from llana to say she was going to start her new job on Thursday and would reply to my e mail soon,  I hope she likes the job,according to her twitter she is tackling it        OK I don’t know how she’s going to finish her book in time,may be the publishers will give her an extra number of months,just extend it a bit.its set in the 80s around Soho,full of Raymond and his revue bars, in the 50s it was more restaurants and seedy stuff,and of course  Quinten Crisp lived there,he use to hang around St Martins most days,he didn’t have far to go then,I use to wander around Foyles fascinating shop,it strikes me now ,how dark most of the shops were,I don’t know if that was true or just my imagination playing me up.

On Tuesday we had a drama going on roger was beside himself, looking after Aunty kit sshe suddenly started halusinateing and thought gas was escaping from the radiator in the bedroom she was so distressed the welfare people came and took her to a nursery home,after a few hours she returned to her lucid self ,how awfull to be in such a plight she has always been so together .mentally as the week has progressed so has she thank goodness.

The local free bee magazine arrived with high scandal in it , the scrap metal chap at the top has been cought working with his lorry and had no up to date licence the one he produced belonged to someone else, the court really went to town on him and there was alsorts of stuff added to the bill until it came to 748£, I was a little bit sorry for him as he is one of the rarest of species around here that was working.!

Then the most depressing day of the week was when I recieved the news from the hospital that my tests have come back and they are positive, I still have Pseudomonus and have to back on the drugs for them, well they didn’t work last time so how will they do it this time,it’s not just haveing the bug that bugs me it’s all the implications t hat go with it, I had to cancell the dental appointment that I had made as yet another filling has fallen out,I cancelled the visit for my heart test as there might be vuneerable people there plus I might pick up something else,I had to tell dad not to bring the girls over, I’d never forgive myself if they caught it ,it all knocks at the days of isolation when I had T b ,a bloody awfull feeling.

On Friday dad came over he had been to the shooting range they have got one up at the local airport, so he is able to go a couple of times with the other old boys,I showed him the mails write up for hitlers lair and he was very enthusiastic about it , says you must go, another blast like Berchesgarten! He then said he is going to sell his collections should be worth a lot now.he left in good humour saying he was going to go home and polish all the daggers up and wash his beer steigns.i don’t know how far he got with that plan, but for a while he was in a very good mood.

Once again the Kernel was good this week plus the nut bit ,I was expecting a little more catty ness from Daphnys column not enough sting in the tail,try better next time ! It’s a jolly good show altogether and the pace has been kept up so a big pat on the back again for the inspiration that lead to you thinking of it in the first place and another one for the execution of it.

By the way after a google search I found what I think was the title from the Shawshank Redemption music, I didn’t realise there was so much music in it but I finally whittled it down to the Duetlino with Edith Mathis and Gundilla Janowitz  from the Marriage of figaro the Bentsche opera Berlin Karl Bohm,now I may have got this completely wrong but it was the only music that sounded classical on that film tract, so I have asked /Stephanie next door to go into the music shop and order me a copy.of course if I’ve got the wrong one entirely I will be quite put out , but if it’s wright I will be highly delighted and have a beautifully piece to soothe my heavy heart(which this week has been fluttering away like a robin in a cage.

Well milo for now there isn’t any more news except repetition of bad news so I will close this still waiting for reply to first letter.     Lots of love nana xxxx

p s Aunty Joan came to see us this week my goodness she looks exactly like Aunty Margaret !

This and that!

I suppose I should be use to not being able to command your attention, but I’m not,I thought the enthusiasm that you greeted last weeks e mail would have helped your attention long enough to give me at least a few lines, however I have decided to give you one more chance, as nice as it was to receive the letter from llana it won’t replace one from you, or did you think a proxy one would be enough ?

The week has been a bit of a bore,nothing much has acurred ,on Monday it was window cleaners day ,thank goodness there is an old saying that if a bird manages a direct hit on you whilst flying past it’s suppose to be lucky ,well it didn’t land on me personally as for one thing I was in the house ,but they ,meaning the seagulls and pigeons ,have had a competition with my windows, and I was very pleased that I could pay someone else to get rid of the lucky muck,barring the bathroom window.

There was a deep frost when I got out of bed,I thought it was snow but no such luck it was a lot colder. I do hope that you are wrapping up warm it’s quite treacherous,I made an appointment for my heart test next month, the appointment came with directions not to wear tights or stockings,in this weather !!!! Washed my hair in the afternoon, even more of it coming out I’m planning to go the full hog soon and wear those nifty little turbans,useing several scarves,I now remember why I’d kept  so many of them,I thought they would come in handy sometime, and when you loose some of your hair and want to embrace that fact with something outlandish, you may join me in a selection .

This week has been punctuated with news from Roger who is over here nurseing Aunty Kit,she is still very lucid and inspite of her body falling to pieces still has a strong heart beat at 97i don’t know how she has managed on her own all these years, it’s very sad.i cooked a pork chop for my supper but couldn’t open the damn apple sauce so didn’t enjoy it so much,it’s now open and waiting for my next extravaganzer ,I bought a new c d via stef,it’s called Renaissance I heard the music on an advert on the television, and my expectations rose,unfortuneatly apart from the first two pieces the rest were not my favourites .

on Wednesday dad and family came over for cottage pie,as I think I told you they have a new pup called Panzer, Nia spends a lot of time with him and now thinks she is a dog,i offered a grape and she growled at me then there was a chorus from NIc Jen and Lily don’t growl Nia.later she was on the floor panting with her tongue out and wagging her little bottom.shes so cute.

Television has been lousy this week  I did see a NBC documentary about Price Albert the period costumes were wonderfull I watch less tv these days,I think the best tele is in the middle of the night,and now I have free view in the bedroom there is a good reason for going to bed early.i have twitted a couple of times, I’m expecting to read when RACarter gets his jimmy saville car.Ive read the kernel avidly and enjoyed the  articles.

There was a report this week that 3new born babies have died with that bad bug I picked up its called Pseudomonas aeruginosa there are a further 24 babies being looked at for it,I was able to learn where the source of the bug comes from as befor it was a mystery to me apparently it could be in the mist when useing the nebulizer or the oxygen or a plant indoor or out, I don’t really see how this has really helped as I still need to. Use them so I will just have to suck it and see,so to. Speak,it’s all a bit depressing though.oh god I remembered you hate medical stuff so you will have to not read that paragraph, though knowing you that decision was already taken.

I see that Hari chap has moved on I would think he would try. To keep a low profile for a while but while he has a few people to champion him he will be rising to the surface very soon,with an another name maybe,it may be impossible for him to stop pinch inching other peoples work, and by his very nature stop writing  dirty stories ,I think you have taken up the cudgel on behalf of other journalist that don’t relish putting it out there , keep y our eye on him and. Go quiet for a while then you can pounce on him when he creeps out of his lair.

Well I am off to do some food for myself the biggest decision for today is what do I want to eat! I see you have been at home today  so you will have chance to read last weeks and today’s.i will expect something in the mail from you very very soon, I will then write you a light breezy job that you will enjoy and be able to take the mickey out of

                    As always nana xxxxx

Absolute amature at this email stuff !

Hi Milo,I’ve just done the most stupid thing by accident ,I put your email of this morning in the dustbin by mistake, I was aiming for the return and obviously missed !silly girl, however you can send me a copy can’t you, you are so clever.I did read it so I know you reluctantly just got my attention in time for this the second bulletin.

This week has been quite full of things and thoughts .got the lovely postman Bill to post Nia’s card i also bought her one of those little dollies pushchairsI,m  still in isolation due to dads cold so won’t be attending the party .heard a loud child’s voice calling grandad grandad open the bloody door , he Leyton is only three ! Thank goodness the girls are in Old Brompton .wednesday the library man Martin bought me a pile of books to read,Stef was here for a coffee and gossip when he asked should he take them upstairs to put them on my bed, the answer as usual was yes please, she thought I had it made,life full of volunteers to make it possible and bearable otherwise independent! then of course the Sainsbury delivery arrived, lots of goodies as well as sensible stuff ,a reminder when I opened the freezer that it needed de frosting,how can that be done when it’s full ?

Thursday chaos due to the hospital visit had to get up earlier to pull myself together,taxi on time but traffic jams everywhere, lots of sick people stumbling about spreading their germs ,or the ones in wheelchairs or useing sticks tripping the rest of us up,me struggling with breathing,other expecting me to not make it, I could see them literally holding their own breaths waiting for the next noisy gasp.a new doctor mine retired after looking after me for 35years ,I have to thank goodness that so far have been lucky enough to find a couple that know their stuff,the first discovered a few months ago that I had the dreaded bug Pseudomonas A eruginosa, and gave me the drug to help it on its way, the second suggested the drug to take for a month to help with breathing as well as the oxygen.this third who is with me a for a year so I thought I’d better interview her see if we were compatable ,yes she knows her stuff  her name is Elena Karampini Greek mother Italian father, she says the heart murmer  is noisy ,I can also hear it without the stethoscope ,back on the azithromisin for the lung for the rest of winter,have to go for ECG must make appointment as I’m on the -Atrial Fibrillation register,that should be a barrel of laughs!

Came home and made a cafe latte delicious,I have rationed coffee. These days as I think I was addicted to it for a while, though in truth I haven’t noticed any improvement in my life style I pee less  perhaps but drink more lemonade these days which I enjoy especially poured over a scoop of Kelly’s icecream.Friday I watched from the window a couple of scrap metal dealers beat an Los washing machine to death,I gather it was to remove the concrete slab that was in it for stability, now that’s a bit of knowledge that I wouldn’t have had if I hadn’t been a nosy Parker.also see out the window someone who has had a loft conversion ,has a full length door put in on this side, one step out of the blasted thing will land them35feet down unless the apple tree is being relied on to break their fall. I do see a very spindly gaurd put up around the door, but we’re the person a fat chap it wouldn’t stop a fly !

It was my week for being stupid this week,no one episode was I have as you know my television on at night to help me sleep well in the dark I went to turn it off several buttons pushed later and it went off, then off course I couldn’t get it on again nothing Nader  I phoned to see if I could get directions on re setting the damn thing, she directed me to the switch that was tucked behind the book case, a after attempting to crawl around the floor for a bit I gave up. An engineer had to be sent for appointment made, then I thought why not pull the plug out of the wall….bingo got it fixed in one cancelled engineer, but stupid not to have remembered the plug in the first place.

Second mistake and a case of sheer stupidity,a knock came at the door I answered it a chap with a parcel for me, an artist friend ken had purchased a desk lamp for himself thought it so good wanted me to have one too,the chap asked if he could wash his hans as a bird had pood on them ok I said into the kitchen he came and gave them a thoughro good wash then he asked if he could use the loo, I did hesitate for a bit then reluctantly said yes, off he went upstairs, I then thought you sill bitch you’ve just let a total stranger come in wash up the go upstairs he could murder you , he could pinch something he could case the joint I looked out the window to see if he had the red post van no he didn’t waited with baited breathe for the chain to be pulled ready with my ivory walking stick for his return, thanks he said and went,I wasn’t very pleased with myself for not sticking to my rules,this is how these things happen, and put in the same position us oldies do still live in the past when we could invite total strangers into our houses, and leave the door open,if you remember that’s how my three Victorian rings were stolen that summer,I hate to say it but we are a vulnerable lot,we do need constant reminders on how to stay safe.and if it’s going to happen to someone it could be me,you remember the caller who wanted to come in to sleep that time fortunately I didn’t open the door but had a conversation of rejection through the glass window ! Enough of this gloom.

Back to being totally English the weather has been drier this week and we have had sun, the sky’s have been particularly beautifully and the air has been cleaner, if it wasn’t so damn cold I would go and spend a while in the garden, Swiss air that’s what I need, but then that’s out of the question. Can’t go anywhere by plane these days and Davos is too high for me to return to unless I had a couple of months to acclimatise.

Roger is still here looking after aunt Kit she will still make her hundredth birthday and her telegram from the Queen, do telegrams still exist or are they all e mails these days,roger has picked up something from the aeroplane the toxins are going to his back, I suggested he saw a doctor, the only time I heard him laugh, for a doctor since he retired he seems to pick up everything,I bet he can’t wait to get back to America,apparently he has missed the game with the funny oval ball,so he is haveing sky put in on his mothers tele,she’s going to love all that ball watching, good time for her to dose don’t you think ?

well I haven’t anything more to say have a delicious Sunday lunch with Jamie  the pork sounds great and iilanas chicken of course.will look forward to your next visit,

Lots of love nana xxxxxxx.           Reply before next Sunday reminder,have a boring week ahead of me. Nebulizer calling now

Sunday morning !

My dear Milo,

I have decided to send you an e mail every Sunday with my weeks news,sometimes there will be very little to read other times it will be brimming with stuff that you will not be able to resist reading, I understand you sometimes  ’dispose’ of e mails that clutter up your box, well forewarned  means you will have at least one that is important for your attention,so hear goes with the first.

Lots of twitter messages cought my eye and of course the Kernel  was read avidly by yours truly.It must be very exciting to see the support the magazine is stirring up„I’m sure there is lots of hard work involved and it shows ,I like the pieces that llana writes,I must read her books some time ,I’m particularly looking forward to Daphnys next article ,are you sure I can’t have that job ?

as I get older the accident book gets fuller by the week,last week the nightmare I had resulted in a couple of arms bruises, and this week after changing my bed clothes and throwing the soiled ones down the stairs instead of carrying them, they landed on the bottom step,when I eventually descended the stairs ,I mentally noted to miss the oxygen flask,unfortunately I missed the entire step and landed on my knees,nothing broken but enormous bruises.now that is a paragraph I can see you missing. But it has to be in this format cos its what’s happening in my neck of the woods ,!

It’s been a strange week partly because it’s a short week with New Year and all that,sorry I mistook the two Jason’s, on New Years Eve I hope you had a fabulous time, I cought the fireworks on the Television I was very impressed, at first I watched a bit of the Edinborough lot I was not impressed,I tuned into the correct channel and saw a great display,Boris is so good at spending the cash when needs be,some things are necessary to keep ones morale and reputation up .

The Bafters are this Thursday, how exciting, a real dressing up event, I see Jamie has made enquiries about hireing a dress, I would think any designer would be only to glad to have a pretty girl like her ,show one of their desighns for nothing, after all most of the guests on the red carpet will be doing that, not the chaps though I suppose you are black tie and dinner jacket,what a pleasure to find and even to go all swanky too,there’s to be some interesting people there, I hope Speiburg gets an award for War Horse ,now there’s a film I want to see, even if I have to wait for it to come on the T.V.Will you write a piece for BLOTTR about it ,? I hope you both have a wonderfully time,red carpet job…wow wow  yippee…..

I’d better make this a shortish first,although truth is I will think of lots of things to write after I’ve sent this off to you,this week in the diary is your little step sister Nia’s  second  birthdayon Wednesday it would be nice if you could send her a card,on Thursday I have to go to the hospital,that will be me looking suspiciously at all the other visitors wondering if I’m going to catch something off them, hospitals are such unhealthy places for the likes of me with my compromised immunity.

Well dear heart, have a good successful week ,enjoy Thursday I will pray for nice dry weather, not the same if you have to get wet or crouch under an umbrella, the idea is to be seen isn’t it!            

As always your ever loving nana. Xxxx 

My sister Margaret use to mark my letters to her for spelling mistakes so mentally I imagine you will be doing the same,I have to point out that you will have an onerous task if you start that, so suggest you just read and enjoy, my spell check on this I pad refuses to help out when I make some guesses so that a good reason to just swim with the tide,it’s also American and refuses me even when I’m right !!!!!!! Xxxx